You were sitting at a bench in Town where you were reading Mitch Albom.

You see, when I'm unable to sleep, my mind drifts to thoughts of you. I think about good things, bad things and uncertain things too.
I'd like to take things in my stride like how you do. But a paranoid mind makes me a stubborn fool.
I never meant to hurt you with the words I use. We all know how untactful I can be, but that's still no excuse.
How priceless you are to me; you have no clue. That's why I'm saying "Sorry baby if I've ever hurt you."



Imagine an empty cube in a dark space. You can't really see it, but you can vaguely make out the outlines of the cube. Then you see a light inside the cube. This light seems to be moving, almost buzzing, in its own space. Doesn't look too bright at first. In fact, you actually wish it would become brighter just so you can fully make out the size of the cube. Then, to your delight, it does.

This bright light morphs into two, and then four, and then eight, and it multiplies even more. Each buzzing light gives off a different color, lighting up the darkness as the now brightly lit cube begins to look smaller as the light becomes bigger. You panic for a bit because you secretly wish for the cube to grow to accommodate all the growing light it's containing, knowing very well it can't. At this point the light has taken up all the space in the cube. The light doesn't seem to stop growing though. You get really frustrated at this point because you want to see just how much light there can be but there just isn't enough room in the cube.

See, that's what I feel about you. The growth is insatiable, but there isn't enough space in my heart to accommodate all of my feelings for you and that frustrates me a lot. It almost feels like I'm betraying you in a sense that you wouldn't be able to receive all the love you deserve simply because there isn't enough space.

Then I remembered to take a step back. I admired the strange, illuminating light that has now filled the darkness with so much color. That's when I realize there is absolutely no need for the cube to get bigger. All I needed was a little light to brighten the place.

Your presence provided that light. For you to go the extra mile in making sure those lights keep growing speaks volumes too.
And I just can't thank you enough for doing that.


****

I know it's damn corny and very the kecoh-pe-sampai-cube-lampu-seme-keluar thing, but I was thinking about that personality test my friend tried on me and he mentioned cubes. I was thinking about fire too. But LED buzzing lights like much nicer in a less harmful way than fire. (Sorry can't help but think about paradox after saying that)

I know you'll be having a field day when you do read this because you'll realize I am supposed to be asleep at this hour. But I figured it would be worth it because:
1. I'm inspired to write about you
2. I'm not sleepy
3. Won't be able to find another time where I'll post something as lengthy as this in a long while
4. You'll actually, finally have a reason for getting angry.
5. Last but not least, I love you very much. (Not relevant, but still very lethal)



I AM GOING TO TRY VERY HARD NOT TO TELL YOU I POSTED THIS BECAUSE I WANNA SEE HOW OFTEN YOU COME HERE. HA HA.

I Love You Hafith. A bloody well lot.